I'm jealous of your bromance
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Randomize
