The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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