i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
