2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize