Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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