he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize