My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
