I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
