You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
