I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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