I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Someone shattered a urinal.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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