I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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