she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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