She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize