i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
