Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
