Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
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