the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
