I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
