JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
