we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
