ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
