We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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