Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
