Have you finally orgasmed yet?
thus making me awesome and them whores
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
