I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
