It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Sorry about my life...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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