Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize