Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
