I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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