Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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