"it" just moved
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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