I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize