Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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