after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
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