I'm pants shitting drunk right now
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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