I think scott just propositioned me for sex
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
