Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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