I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize