we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
