You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
