i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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