i think i have herpe
just one?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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