I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
