my mouth tastes like poor choices
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
