If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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