Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
