at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
