I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
