now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
