Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
